Roots and Branches
Views of the forest are seen, with big trees, many animals running in it, an intern eating a sandwich when a tarantula as big as his hand falls on his head, a river, where a crocodile looks at the camera, and then, a man in front of it, close to the trees. Chris: Welcome Total Drama fans, to this new season, highlighted by me, the greatest TV host, Chris McLean! Some of you may thought I was over after that new show called The Ridonculous Race, betrayed by my own cast (and I am not looking at anyone partucularlly, Geoff, Owen, Noah and Leonard) but as you can see, I am not! I am back, and stronger and deadlier than ever! *presses a button, and something explodes on the back* Hahah! Viktor: *walks in* No, no, no! Mr. McLean, we agreed with the contract to no more damages or explosions to the forest! Chris: Yeah, whatever. This is Viktor I don't care what surname, sent by the producers to make sure I don't damamge the environment... Viktor: Something that must be a real challenge to you! *laughs at his pun* Chris: *glares* Hah, so funny... Well, this season has this special characteristic as we decided to kick things off on the AMAZON! The World's Lung, about to become the Drama Lung! Viktor: *rolls eyes* Chris: We'll have deadly challenges, stupid contestants, relationships, hate, friendship... Anyways, all of what I can bring to the table! Make sure to catch up Total... Drama... Brazilian Rainforest! After the theme song. Chris: Welcome back to Total Drama Brazilian Rainforest! We're here to meet some of the contestants that will be fighting for ONE.... MILLION... DOLLARS! *Viktor appears with the open suitcase in his arms* Make sure not even a bill falls. *he rolls eyes, and closes the suitcase* So, I won't explain the rules now, but when everyone comes, don't ask me again. This part will be edited out, right? *camera makes nod movement* Nice. First off, meet Jasmine, the perfect contestant for this edition. *she waves* Seriouslly, fail it this time, and it would be so ashaming. Jasmine: Yeah, not happening! This time, the money is comming with me! Hi Shawn! *waves to the camera* Chris: So, how are things going with Zombie Nut? Jasmine: Me and Shawn are doing fine... he's right there cheering for me... We've even adopted a koala and called it Chris! Man, that koala has really disguisting stomach problems... *Viktor laughs* Chris: Enough! *she walks off* Next one is Duncan, our favourite criminal! Duncan: Can you repeat me why am I here again? Chris: You're here because it was competing for another season, or two years in prision... *shows contract* Duncan: One day, McLean... one day I'll geta ll the contracts and burn them! As of what put of prision means, I am fine with it... *walks to Jasmine* Chris: *glares* And our next contestant is Noah, the backstabber. Seems like he has decided to ask for forgiveness by comming here to compete another time... As if that would work, traitor. Noah: Yeah, as usual, I am being the favourite. Yipee. This is so good. *approaches to the others, and reads book* Chris: Ugh... why can't you guys show a bit of enthusiasm? Next one is... *Owen hugs him* Owen: How're ya doing Old Pal? I AM BACK! AND THIS IS SO... SO... SO... AWESOME! Chris: *trying to breath* Less enthusiasm, less enthusiasm... Owen: *throws Chris away* Noah! LITTLE BUDDY! *hugs him* YAY! TOGETHER AGAIN! Noah: *trying to breath* Yay... Duncan: *gives a wedgie to Noah* Chris: *getting up* Next one is... ugh... *reads paper* SCARLETT! Jasmine: What?! *the other three look at where the host and Jasmine are looking* Scarlett: Well, hello. What a nice arrival. Chris: Wait... youre normal and not trying to kill everyone? Scarlett: I discovered my behavoir was so primary, and inferior from my knowledge... I decided to change my ways.. I am back to use all my intelligence to win this million fair and square.. heh.. what a classic expression. Chris: Yeah.. very normal... *whispering* Keep an eye on her... *she walks with the rest, that stare at her* Next one is.. Blaineley? Who selected this cast, a troglodite?! Viktor: Pretty sure the producers did... Chris: I mean, this is precious, the greates one I've ever seen! Welcome Blaineley! Blaineley: *appears, holding a sign that states "Saving my voice for somehting that is worthy enough"* Chris: Ok... *sighs* And there's also Lightning... Lightning: WHASSAP PEOPLE? THE SHA-BOSS IS HERE! SHA-LIGHTNING! Duncan: Oh, maan... Chris: Yeah, we can share that opinion... still, there's more people to introduce, and they're from... the Ridonculous Race! How you feeling now, Don? Who was backstabbed now, huh? Who's the Sha-Boss? Lightning: Nobody steals from the Lightning! Chris: Whatever... Meet Jacques, the Ice Dancer! Jacques: *jumps next to Chris, and poses* Merci! Merci! *blows kisses and waves* Lightning: I like that style! The crowd goes crazy! Lightning! Lightning! Chris: Braid you hair later guys, I still have job to do... Jacques: *conf* I am on Total Drama now, without Josee, but still ready to kick it... without cheating.... *stares, and laughs* Who am I kidding? What counts is.. GOLD. Chris: There's also Mickey... Mickey: Hi everyone! Duncan: Hah! The guy's smaller than my di... Chris: *cuts Duncan* Hi, go with the rest, ok? It's over there, but look out.. Mickey: As if I was a baby.. I've been on TV before... *walks to the rest, but trips* Chris: Hahah! Just wanted to warn about the rock there, but I guess he won't need it now... Also competing Spud, the Rocker! Spud: *walks slowly* Chris: *waits, but he says nothing. He sighs* And the fashionista Jen! Jen: Hey, hey, hey! The winner's in the house! *sees Chris* Oh my God! That hair! EEE! Chris: I like this girl... Jen: You have to tell me where you got that wig from, totes! Chris: Brr... Go and piss someone else! Spud: WOAH, HI MAN! Chris: *scared* Oh, hi... Now I know what delay reaction means... Spud: *walks to the rest, rocking* Chris: And we also have.. Hmm... Crimson. Crimson: *walks motionless* Chris: Yeah, I was also warned about the absence of words... wonder how long will she reach... Kitty: *runs* You're Chris! EE! *takes a selfie with him* Another selfie with a celebrity! Blaineley: Then you should take one with me! *everyone looks at her, as she talked* Kitty: Oh, you're famous? Who are you, again? Blaineley: That's not funny, little girl! I'll take you down, I'll...! *Owen and Lightning force her to stay* Chris: And this is Kitty, someone I am totally rooting for. Kitty: Ooooh, thanks! Chris: Now, go with the rest... also to introduce Devin! Devin: Hi everyone! *waves* Owen: *looks in amazement* He's perfect... *conf* He's the best bud I've always wanted! Kitty: Hi, Owen! Owen: Oh, hi Kitty! Devin: *conf* I am not sure of being here with Kitty... She first slapped me, and then also decided to throw me down a mountain.. sometimes I have weird dreams about a giantess Kitty crushing me with her foot... This sound really weird, didn't it? Chris: And also meet Laurie, another hippie. Laurie: Vegan. Chris: Isn't it the same? Laurie: Ignorant, being a vegan doesn't make you a hippie! Chris: But are you hippie? Laurie: Yes, but it has nothing to do with being Vegan! Chris: I am getting really confused, walk off... *Laurie walks to the rest* And just one left to introduce, Tammy! Tammy: *throws conffetti* Chris: Yeah, let's celebrate and all. Tell Leonard he still owns me five bucks. Tammy: Why? Chris: We bet he was going to be the first on going in RR... and as you can see, I was right. But he's telling me that he wasn't the first one out, but you two were, so I can't get my money.. tell him to safe all of that, and pay me. Tammy: *shrugs, and goes with the rest* Chris: Now that the cast is here, let's explain the rules and make the teams! Kitty: Yay! Which are, this time? Chris: The rules are simple... this time, no cabin, no Spa Hotel... The teams will have to sleep... in the jungle! Jen and Blaineley: O-M-G! Chris: Yes, and this is THE jungle, so there are many dangerous beasts and poisonus animals... *the intern with the tarantula in his head runs by, shouting* Laurie: Animals are our friends, they wouldn't hurt us! Chris: Oh, you can tell, you ate a sheep head. Laurie: I don't wanna talk about it! Jacques: Nobody steals from me! Lightning: Sha- Brother! Chris: Ok, as I was saying... Spud: AAAAAAH! THAT MAN HAS A GIANT SPIDER ON HIS HEAD! Chris: ... The team that wins will be able to pick between two rewards: A massive amount of fried and re-fried food... Owen: Me Likey. Chris: ... Or the Surprise Prize! *gets out a new object* Pressing this button, you're renouncing to the food prize, but you're opening up many possibilities... Jasmine: Like what? Chris: Win, and you'll get a chance to know! Anyways, now introducing the teams! Duncan: Finally! Chris: Team 1, Jasmine, Mickey, Scarlett, Blaineley, Jacques and Lightning, you are the Persuasive Panthers! Lightning: Can we change it to Lightning's squad? Jacques: Or for the Gold Owners? Mickey: Anyone has a Tissue? Chris: Shesh! Teams stay as they are! Devin: Can you please follow? Chris: Sure, you are going with Jen, Spud, Tammy and Laurie. Tammy: *throws conffetti* Devin: *conf* Phew. No Kitty, No Problems. I hope. Chris: And you'll be known as the Tenacious Toucans! Laurie: Cool! I like toucans. Spud: So, what will our name be? Chris: *rolls eyes* The rest, Kitty, Owen, Noah, Duncan and Crimson, you're going to be the Euphoric Eagles! Kitty: Team selfie! Owen: YAS! *hugs Kitty and Noah* Duncan: So... what's with you, girl? Crimson: Nothing. Duncan: Ok.. *Owen grabs the two too into a hug* Chris: Now that all is done, follow me! Challenge time! Teams are walking throught the jungle. Lightning: Ok, Sha-people! I think I should totally be the team captain! I am the captain at every sports team I am on! Jacques: I dont think you have any gold medal, so eadership goes to me. Jasmine: From what I've heard, you also don't have a gold medal... Jacques: *glares* Still, I was in the Olympics, this totally leaves me in charge! Blaineley: And the drama on our team intensifies, as the battle for the leadership is on! Mickey: *conf, holding his legs as a human ball* I don't like my team... I doubt any of those does really care about if all the teammates survive... Kitty: So, Devin... How are things with Carrie? Devin: We're doing completely fine, she's the best! *discovers with who he is talking* Well, yeah, we're doing great... Crimson: *rolls eyes* You were so cool before... *walks off* Duncan: *pops in, as Devin also leaves, confused* So, what's wrong with her? You knew her from before, right? Kitty: Well, she has always been really introverted and unfirendly... I guess she has had a tough life... Duncan: Those are my favourites... Kitty: ... Aaand she has a boyfriend. Duncan: As I said, my favourites. Kitty: *sighs, and waks off* Owen: How's Emma doing? Noah: She's doing great. She has already planned the top 20 names she likes for kids... Owen: Wow. She's taking this so serious... Noah: Meh. I guess all girls do that. Owen: Izzy just thought on bitting my arms, and Miranda... Noah: Who? Owen: My new girlfriend. *smiles* Noah: You have a girlfriend?! Owen: Yep, since before the Ridonculous Race... *giggles* She's awesome. Noah: And why didn't I know anything from her? Owen: Because every time I tried to talk to you about my things in RR, you cut me to talk about Emma. Noah: Oh. Right. Tammy: *throws conffetti* We've arrived! Chris: Yes, we have. *Huge trees with a three platforms with vines are shown at the side of the river.* Now, teams, get to those elevators... Jen: These are elevators? I do have to mention that your taste for decoration is even more awful than your taste for the clothing... Chris: Hey, whats wrong with my..? *sigh* Just shut up already, and get there! *teams walk to the platforms* Wait.. before using the elevators, I need someone from each team to stay here, on the ground, and go with Viktor. Viktor: I didn't wanted to get involved into this kind of stuff... Chris: Still! Any volunteers? Crimson: I'll do it. Blaineley: And I'll go for my team! Jen: I can go for mine... Chris: Perfect, girls. Now follow him. *the three girls and Viktor walk off* Let's go up... Now! *Hits interns with a whip, and they pull the vines, making the platforms go up. The platforms get to the nearlly the top of the tree, where there are holes to stick them.* Spud: Wow. I bet I can see my house from here! Noah: Do you know we're in the jungle, right? Spud: We're in the jungle? What?! Chris: Alright teams. Do you see those suitcases over there? *points at a table down, with Viktor, that looks at the three of them.* Inside them, there are a bag of fried and re fried food and the Surprise Prize Button. The first team to open the case wins, and picks what they preffer from both prizes. Duncan: This should be easy... *cracks knuckles* I am really skilled with this... Chris: Not so fast, Goody-Goody. Duncan: What? Oh, you're going to see what it comes for that... *advances, willing to punch him, but Owen and Devin prevent him from doing so* Scarlett: Please, continue. Chris: Anyways, the cases are locked, and they can only be opened by a combination of two numbers... Numbers you can get from the river! *a piranha eats a fish, a crocodile eats the piranha, an anaconda eats the crocodile, and a jaguar jumps on it, grabs her neck in its fangs and runs away.* Mickey: *faints* Laurie: GASP Tammy: No conffetti for this... Chris: Anyways, there are multiple balls in the river, that contain a number each. Once you get a ball, you toss it to your teammate that stood on the ground, and she must put it on the combination. Blaineley: And the last team to open the case will be facing elimination! Chris: Hey, I had to say that! *Blaineley shuts up* Yeah, team that comes in last will be facing elimination... Viktor: Those balls aren't plastic ones, right? Chris: No, Environment Freak! The balls are of rice, with a chemichal that prevents animals from eating them. In two hours, chemichal will be completely gone, and the animals will be able to eat them with no concern. I am an eco-friendly Chris! Jasmine: And how are we supposed to go down the river from here, Eco Friendly Chris? Chris: Using this! *shows rope* You have to bungee jump, grab a ball and you'll get all the way here. Then, toss the ball, and another team memeber jumps next. Jacques: I love jumping. I am magnifique at that! Lightning: You can go first then! Sha-victory! Duncan: I'll go. I don't want you girls to get hurt. *laughs, as Noah, Owen and Kitty glare at him* Laurie: I'll go for our team. *puts it on* Chris: Ready.... GO! *the three jump* Jacques: Time for the show! *smiles, and does many weird flips.* Oh, lala! *flips and poses* Perfection! *flips, but fails, and ends up tied up completely with the rope, as a giant caterpillar.* Hmmfffp! Mickey: Was that part of the plan? Lightning: Go, Sha-Mpion! Duncan: This is easy! *reaches the river, and tries to get a ball, but is back again to the top, where he crashes with Noah* Kitty: Uh, are you guys ok? Duncan: *conf* Maybe it's not that easy... too fast! Owen: *puts it on* I'll avenge you! *jumps* EEEEEEE! Laurie: *going up* I have one! *Owen crashes with her, and both go down, until they reach the river again. The ball bounces and Jen catches it.* Jen: Allright! *intorduces code in case* Ok... *it doesn't open* Uugh! Kitty: Yay, go Owen! Go team! Owen: *goes up, and lands on Noah and Duncan* Heheh.. shorry... Laurie: *crashes* Brrrr! Devin: Wooh, they cheated! That ball must be ours! Lightning: *pulls tied up Jacques up* My Sha-turn! *puts it on, and jumps, on a perfect diving pose* Tammy: My turn... *puts it on* Kitty: Well, guys... as you're so busy... I'll take it from my own! And get a selfie from it! *runs* Devin: *still shouting at Jen* Cheaters! *Kitty crashes with him, and both fall, but him without any rope, screaming* Kitty: *conf* Oops. Sorry, Devin... *nervous smile* Devin: *conf, hands on the air* WHYYYY? WHYYY?! Owen: DEVIN! *conf* I can't let my futur best bud down... literally... Noah: Are you ok, man? Owen: I'LL SAVE YOOOOOU! *jumps* Tammy: *jumps* For the powers of Miriandel! Lightning: *reaches the top, with a ball.* That's how winners do it... *throws the ball to Blaineley* Blaineley: And looks like the Jaguars are taking the lead! Chris: *appears, spitting coffee* That's my job! Blaineley: Oh, yeah.. anyways, the number isn't the right one... Kitty: *Reaches water* Got one! Devin: AAAAGH! *falls close to her* Owen: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA! *falls on Devin, and both sink* Kitty: *reaches top* Here, new number! *throws it, and Crimson catches it, and puts it in.* Crimson: Nothing. Spud: Ouch, that must hurt! Poor Dev. Tammy: *reaches top* Here it is... *throws number to Jen, who puts it in* Jen: It works! Just one more to go! Laurie: Yes! Cheaters don't win! Noah: *glares* Owen: You ok, buddy? *in the river, with Devin* Devin: *panting* You nearlly got me out of breath... man, what a squish... caution, ok? Owen: Sure thing... *conf* He called me Man. We're getting to nicknames... that's good for Best Friends, right? Devin: Uh, what's this? Owen: What? *piranhas start bitting both* AAAA! Devin: OOOUCH! *bothr un away* Chris: Hahahah... Those idiots will always make me laugh... Jasmine: I'll go now. Maybe this time there's luck! Scarlett: I can calculate the exact speed you can fall at to be able to have time to get a ball... Jasmine: No time! *Jumps* Noah: Let's trust in the destiny... Duncan: *pushes him, and he screams* Sorry, dude. This was part of destiny! Spud: I'll go now! *starts making guitar noises* Laurie: Yeah, let's better put it on his foot and push him... *Tammy shrugs, and they put it on his feet* Jasmine: *gets to the top again, with the ball* Now let's see! *throws it at Blaineley* Blaineley: And the Australian Amazon passes the ball, and it is... Correct! One to go for the Panthers! Spud: *falling motionless, until the river, where he grabs a ball, and comes up* Noah: *going up again, with an anaconda bitting his dick. He has a disturbed face* Laurie: *throws the ball to Jen* Go, team! Spud: *makes scared face* AAAAAAAAAAH! Tammy: Hey! You should have allowed me to give a blessing to the ball, so it was the proper one! Laurie: But... Tammy: It worked before, didn't it? Laurie: I guess.... Maybe now it's also the good one! Jen: *voice is heard* Guys, it's the wrong one! Tammy: See? Devin: *Arrives, with several bites* Who's turn it is, now? Laurie: It's yours... you fell before, on Tammy's turn... So, get to jump! Devin: You gotta be kid... *Laurie puts it on him, and pushes him down* AAAAAAH! Owen: *also arrives, and drops himself to the floor* Who... who goes? Kitty: Duncan again, once he gets the anaconda out of Noah's crotch... Owen: NOAH!!! I SHOULD HAVE KET AN EYE ON HIM! *cries* NOW HE'S GOING TO DIIIIIEEE BWAAAAA! Kitty: What? Owen: *crying* Because of the venom BWAAA Kitty: Oh, don't worry! Anacondas aren't venomous! Owen: They aren't?! YAY! *hugs Kitty* Noah: But their bite still hurts! Ouch! Duncan: *pulls anaconda, and throws it to the river* Done, my turn. *puts it on* Jasmine: Mickey, you go! Mickey: *nervous* No, better Scarlett! Scarlett: Actually, I would preffer to be left for later, as I think I have a proper impression about... Mickey: Ok, I'll do it! *frightened* Wish m-me luck... *jumps* Devin: I have one! *crashes with Spud* Spud: Devin? You are here again? Yeah, man! Laurie: *throws the ball to Jen* Tammy: Ehem... What about the blessing part? Laurie: As I said, it's all a coincidence, there's no way... Jen: *voice heard* Not this one, guys! Keep moving! Tammy: Really? This can't be a coincidence! Duncan: *comming up, a jaguar jumps, and he dodges it closely, before landing perfectly close to the others. He throws the ball to Crimson, while Kitty and Owen cheer* Crimson: This one works. Yes. Duncan: *conf* This must have impressed her! I looked so cool! Blaineley: And the teams are now tied up! Which will be the most succesful one? Chris: STOP. DOING. MY. JOB! Blaineley: It's not my fault, being more talented than you! Jasmine: Mickey? *the rope comes back, but instead of Mickey, there's a crocodile and the rope comes out from its mouth* Ugh... *grabs croc, and starts choking it* Let's do it on the Australian way! *croc spits Mickey* Mickey: I have a ball... *coughs* Lightning: *throws the ball at Blaineley, that grabs it* Now throw the croc back. Scarlett: *before Jasmine throws it* Wait... sabotage! Noah: Ok, Big O, you're next... *a crocodile crashes with him, and both fall down* AAAAH! Owen: NOAH! *jumps* Kitty: *rolls eyes* Not again... Laurie: *lands close to her team* Done! *gets ready to throw it* Tammy: WAIT! *grabs it* For the powers of Miriandel! Be the right ball! Now you can throw it. Laurie: As if that would work... *throws it* Jen: *writes it, and the suitcase opens* EEEE! WE WON! IT'S THE RIGHT ONE! Laurie: *opens mouth* Tammy: See? Devin: WO-HO! Chris: Congratulations, Tenacious Toucans! You won the challenge! Now, which reward do you pick? Spud: WE WOOON! Let's rock! Jen: Hmm... the Surprise Prize! Laurie: Wait! Jen: *presses button, and a ticket gets out* Devin: What does it say? Jen: *reads* Helmets for all! How's that a prize? Chris: You team, will have a helmet each! It may be useful for future challenges... *shrugs* Only God knows... Devin: We could have picked the food... now we'll have to hunt... Laurie: HUNT?! *conf, breathes in a paper box* Noah: *climbing the tree, with croc bitting his ass* Someone, go, now! Kitty: *jumps* There I gooo! *takes selfie, and lands in the river* Blaineley: C'mon, guys! This one's also the wrong ball! Scarlett: My turn. My superior knowledge's more accurated theory is up for the ball being exactly on that underwater log. Jacques: Would you just go? We need at least silver! Scarlett: *jumps* Kitty: Got one! *piranha bites her hand* OUCH! *gets pulled up* Scarlett: *goes up* Got one, exactly as I said! Jasmine: Let's just trust it's the right one! *throws it at Blaineley, who fails at catching it, and runs behind it* Owen: We need to get that out! *farts on the piranha, that opens mouth and falls* Kitty: *throws ball at Crimson* Crimson: *runs* Blaineley: *runs* Lightning: C'mon! For the Sha-win! Blaineley: *stops* And now it's all an intensive run to the suitcases, highlighted by your host, the best Blaineley! Crimson: *puts code, and suitcase opens* Done. Kitty: YAY! *hugs Owen* Duncan: You got this, girl! Noah: Phew. So close. Chris: Eagles, you're in second! Panthers, from what it takes to you, you are up for elimination! See you this night! Jacques: *runs away, crying* Noah: Do we get any reward? Chris: Hmm... I guess team two should get a reward... I KNOW! Team that comes in second gets the reward of getting what the first team hasn't picked! You get fired and re fried food! No need to hunt! Owen: *conf* This can't be possible... A dream come true! Noah: Wow. Even a better reward than the first ones. I say let's come always in second! Duncan: *to Crimson* So, how was I? Crimson: Irrelevant. Kitty got the ball, Owen farted on the piranha and I opened the case. You did nothing. *walks off* Duncan: I like difficult girls. *smiles, and walks off too* Elimination Ceremony Chris: Welcome to the first elimination ceremony of this season! This time, I have marshmallows, until Viktor finds me anything better to give to you, more Brazilian. Viktor: That's not my job! Chris: Shesh! Anyways, you can cast your votes in the confessional. Jasmine: *conf, crosses a picture* Lightning: *conf* That Mickey is dead weight! Blaineley: *conf* Scarlett, her calculations are sooooo unexciting! Jacques: *conf* Stupid Blaineley costed us the gold! Chris: Anyways, I have marshmallows for Jasmine! *she gets her* Lightning and Jacques! *they get theirs* Aaand... Scarlett! *she grabs her marshmallow* And the last one goes to.... 3 2 1 ... MICKEY! Mickey: Thanks! *marshmallow hits his head, and he falls of his seat* Blaineley: What?! You dared to eliminate me, peasants?! Jacques: Yes we did. You costed us the challenge! Blaineley: But I am a better host! Everyone should see that! Chris: Yeah, follow me... *Chris and Blaineley walk to a certain point.* Stay here... *presses button, and Blaineley gets sucked in a hole.* Lightning: What the Sha is that? Chris: *reveals a huge mechanic cage behind, like a prize machine* This is the Loser Container! The eliminated contestants will stay in there, and every day, they'll be given the food they need! There are cameras, so we can also see what they do inside! On the grand finale, you'll see why this machine will be used... Mickey: B-but... I have claustrophobia... Chris: *shrugs* Make sure to not be elimianted then... Viktor: So much logic.... Chris: Will Duncan kiss Crimson? Will Mickey really be the next one out? Discover it soon, on Total... Drama... Brailiiiiian Rainforest! Category:Episodes